Sunday, August 14, 2005

Art appreciation

Recently, one "Floyd Alvis Cooper" left a comment at The Poor Man that was, in my opinion, a work of art. Floyd wrote:

I know this isn’t going to popular on this website, but may I just point something out?

A soldier’s #1 job is to stay alive. If you die, you can’t accomplish the mission, and you weaken your team and put your buddies in danger.

Obviously Sheehan’s son, I forget his name at the moment, didn’t die on purpose, and he may well have have had no control over the circumstances that let to his death.


In war, there are no excuses. You find a way to stay alive, whatever it takes — if you’re a good soldier. Sheehan’s son didn’t do that. He paid the price. but he als failed the mission and let down his buddies.

As a soldier, he was a failure. He was brave (maybe), but he was also incompetent.

So, really, how much exactly are we supposed to grieve over this guy? Isn’t a certain amount of disapproval in order for the guy — and by extension his mom, for making such a fuss over a person who was, in the last analysis, by definition a loser?

So shouldn’t Mrs. Sheenhan be showing a little more shame about the situation and maybe not wanting to get her son and his shortcoming splashed all over the media?

Something to consider, anyway.

Not everyone appreciated Floyd's art. Lots of people, quite understandably, thought Floyd was a dead-serious wingnut. I however felt myself to be in the presence of a great talent.

The Editors of The Poor Man wrote a whole post about Floyd, in which The Editors recognized that Floyd is an artist but expressed a certain amount of disdain for his medium, trolling.

Me, I love a well-executed troll post, in part because they're so rare. Trolls abound on the Internet but 99% of them are dreadful, witless bores. Truly talented trolls, trolls of genius and artistry, are few and far between.

My favorite troll ever used to frequent ABC's message boards under various screen names, "Jed_Chalmers" and "Venus_Montgomery" being two of them. "Jed" was a GENIUS. A surrealist, he created whole series of posts that were works of art. I cut and pasted and saved a handful of them, but only a handful, alas. I didn't save the other posters' outraged and disgusted responses, which were in their own way just as funny as Jed's work. Anyway, here is a sample of Jed's art:

Author: Venus_Mongomery
Do others think Powell's small stature to be a hindrance to his performing his diplomatic mission. I have read a report that when the Egyptian representative saw how small Powell stood he started grinning and spoke to Powell in a most disrespectful manner. Later he was heard to refer to our Sect of State as a "runt" and "a mere child" because of his diminished stature (apparently between 4'8" and 5'2" from what I have been able to find).

Author: Venus_Mongomery
As an American I am very very ashamed by C.Gordin Powell's stature. This man is representing America and I see no purpose in sending something who is barely five foot tall around the globe to pursuade allies and foes that we are in this for the long duration. An Arab diplomat hit the nail on the head when he said "People who are tiny like Powell tire easy. Diminutive men like Powell should not be used to represent the interests of the US." I agree. I have even seen a homepage which states the man stands less than 5'. That's crazy.

Author: Venus_Mongomery
So everyone is telling me they care not that we send a 4 foot runt who's metal arms hang uselessly by his side out to represent this country? I for one am appalled and slackjawed by the circus freakshow atmosphere that attends this "general" whereever he goes. What is the point of heavy metal arms in any case? He can barely move them and just standing exhausts him so much he more often than not makes his entrance lying in a wheelbarrel gasping for air. His appearance in India last week made the Prime Ministers wife shriek with fright at his initial appearance. "He was like a little monster." the shocked woman cried. "A little monster with gleaming metal arms."

4. Subject: SAGER
Author: Venus_Mongomery
I am very interested in assessing the physical stature of individuals engaged in politics. From Senator Bruce Torrence (who barely stands one inch tall) to Jack Babs Babbett (PM of Tongo) who stands more than 11 foot tall. I am particularly interested in the use of metals in body composition because I myself have large parts of my body composed of metalic and ceramic substances.

5. Subject: ERZULIIE
Author: Venus_Mongomery
No wait just a minute. I'm not here to be insulted by the likes of you. It just so happens that I, like Powell, am comprised of materials that are both metal and ceramic. Several of my organs are made of a metallic substance (kidneys, liver, pancreas) and many of the bones in my hands are made of ceramic. My father, the Barron Jed Chalmers who lived in the Castle Brent in the French Districts on the West Bank did this to me. I resent it.

Author: Venus_Mongomery
My skeletal structure is comprised mostly of a shiney ceramic material. When I first became aware I found myself working in a farm field and considered myself to be a large large farm machine. Once, upon moving close to the river, I heard the unpleasant children of the Baron mocking me and saying "Look, look at the monsterous giant Father has made out of flesh, metal and clay." From that day on I have struggled to come to grips with two issues: physical height and material composition. I therefore find the tiny tiny runtish Powell and his metal arms quite interesting

7. Subject: TO: iSLAM666
Author: Venus_Mongomery
Dear Mr. Islam666 (though I doubt that is your true name). No I am not as famous as Powell nor am I as physically as small as the tiny 2 foot metal dwarf who basically sits motionless in a wheelbarrel. But you see I myself am physically freakish (I stand more than 15 foot tall) and am made of many many materials other than human flesh. The only consolation is that I can move, whereas Powell is one piece of metal with no moving parts. I once had a small child like that. I gave birth to my baby. It was made of metal. It moved a little but then it stopped and was still. I poked at it but it did not move. It did not make any noises. It just lay there. Finally I put it in a closet where it remains to this day. In Paris.


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