Saturday, April 29, 2006

Bush: Immigrants should learn to sing national anthem in American, like Jesus intended

OK, so that's not exactly what he said. But still:

"I think the national anthem ought to be sung in English," Bush said in response to a question, "and I think people who want to be a citizen of this country ought to learn English, and they ought to learn to sing the national anthem in English."

I understand the bit about learning English, but - why, exactly, should they "learn to sing the national anthem in English?" Hell, most native-born Americans can't sing the damn thing.

Also: If immigrants should be required to learn English, shouldn't our president set an example and learn to speak English himself?

From the same article:

However, Bush said in the Rose Garden on Friday that he doesn't believe "there's any [gasoline] rip-off taking place." He added, "It's the role of the Federal Trade Commission to assure me that my inclination and instincts is right."

Is our immigrants learning?

That quote is also notable in that Bush sets forth his personal philosophy of government - that it's the job of federal agencies to assure him that he's right.


Thursday, April 27, 2006

Republicans to Americans: Now that we've established what you are, we're just haggling over the price

Having been given to believe that Americans' votes can be bought for a $300.00 tax rebate check, the GOP tries to get a discount on the 2006 midterms . . .

Have you seen that new Mormon Church commercial?

You know, the one about how the Book of Mormon is like, The Bible, Part Deux? Or to be more precise, about how the Bible is the prequel to the Book of Mormon . . .

Anyway. Will this help or hurt Mitt Romney's presidential bid? Discuss.

More actual discussion about whether being Mormon will affect Romney's chances here (though sadly there's no discussion about that commercial. Has anyone besides me actually seen it?)

I looked up "dumb-ass" in the dictionary, and there was a picture of John Stossel

If "greed" meant "earning a living" instead of

excessive desire to acquire or possess more (especially more material wealth) than one needs or deserves 2: reprehensible acquisitiveness; insatiable desire for wealth (personified as one of the deadly sins)

then John Stossel might have a point.

(via tbogg)

Technical difficulties

When I started this blog, I used a free service called Walagata to host images. Walagata recently put the kibosh on its free accounts, and a bunch of my blog images went kablooie. So I've got to go back and fix them, one at a time. Bleah.

MD warned me about this but I forgot. Next time I'll jump when you speak, sweetie!

Attention, people of the Internets

It's "hypocrisy." Not "hypocracy."

And, "atheist." Not "athiest."

When you type "viscous," 99% of you mean "vicious."

Also: "Loser." Not "looser."

That is all for now.


Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Announcing the Dick Cheney Ready, Fire, Aim! Award

The inaugural award in this category goes to South Carolina state legislator Thad Viers, (R) Horry County.

Earlier this month Mr. Viers acquired an AK-47 assault rifle given away in a contest drawing by a right-wing student newspaper at Clemson University (according to the story in the Myrtle Beach Sun News, Mr. Viers didn't win the drawing - the first two winners declined the weapon, and the third person picked gave it to Viers). Mr. Viers waxed enthusiastic about his new toy:

Viers was in the woods near the Anderson-Greenville county line on Friday getting the required range training that came with the prize.

"It was great today," Viers said. "I got the NRA-certified instructor, he showed me how to use it. I never shot one before.

"It was one of those guns that you've heard a lot about in movies and stuff and now they're legal to own. This is going to be my sixth gun."

Although Mr. Viers has heard a lot about his AK-47 "in movies and stuff," he thinks "some of the movies like 'Rambo' and some of the other ones have given (the AK-47) a bad name." Indeed, Hollywood never shows how an AK-47 can be really useful for wholesome sports like deer hunting. You know, if you need to fire 600 rounds per minute into a deer, the AK-47's your weapon.

According to Mr. Viers, as quoted by the Sun News , "You're not exercising your Second Amendment (rights) unless you own a gun."

I wouldn't be exercising my First Amendment rights if I didn't point out that Mr. Viers is a bit of a twit who, when he's not shooting his guns, can be found shooting off his mouth. Like when he had a hissy fit because a judge didn't rule his way: In 2003, Viers, representing some Horry County homeowners, sought to have the Horry County Zoning Board reconsider its approval of a proposed methadone clinic. Circuit Court Judge John Breeden issued an injunction blocking the zoning board from reconsidering its previous approval (subsequent to which approval the clinic's owners had spent $400,000.00 seeking a state permit to operate the clinic, according to an affidavit submitted to the court).

The judge issued his ruling in spite of a threat from Viers:

On Friday, when Viers learned the clinic was asking a judge to rule, Representative Viers said, "They forget in this state that I get to vote on the judges." [in South Carolina judges are selected by the legislature] He later said the comment was not serious and prompted by anger.

Before the hearing began, Breeden warned that "intimidation and veiled threats cannot be allowed," and he promised to "rule without fear or favor."

Ironically, and moronically, Rep. Viers is now sponsoring a dreadfully ill-considered piece of legislation that would dramatically interfere with South Carolina county governments' ability to make zoning decisions; it would force counties to pay property owners the value of whose property is reduced in any way by zoning. In other words, if this bill were in effect in 2003, and if Rep. Viers had gotten what he wanted from the Horry County Zoning Board, Horry County would have had to pay a truckload of money to the owners of the proposed methadone clinic. * (Google cached version of the zoning story as it appeared in the Sun News, from which quotes are taken, is here)

So that's a little background on the winner of the Dick Cheney Ready, Fire, Aim! Award. Enjoy your new assault weapon, Rep. Viers!

* FWIW, although I think the legislation in question is a terrible idea, it doesn't follow that I think the court's decision in the methadone clinic case was wrong. In that particular case, the county had already approved the use, and the clinic's owners had apparently spent a great deal of money in reliance on being allowed to operate as permitted by the county. Which means, I think, that if Viers had had his way in 2003, the county might have wound up having to pay dearly, even without this bonehead legislation.

Bejus vs. Bejus

Chez Grace, compare the Discovery Channel Jesus with the Warner Brothers Jesus.

Hmm. Which one would be more likely to be required to remove his sandals at an airport security checkpoint?

NTodd wants 419,067 hits

in his pants.

OK, not really . . . on his blog.

Go help him reach his totally arbitrary goal; enjoy the superlative petblogging while you're over there.

Pop quiz

Today, President Bush said:

a) "I'm the decider, see? That means I get to decide. And I decided Secretary Rumsfeld's doin' a fabulous job."

b) "See, I make the decisions. I'm a decision president. And my decision is, Secretary Rumsfeld stays."

c) "I made a decision. See, when you've made a decision, that means . . . that means you've decided. And, uh, what I decisioned was, Secretary Rumsfeld is the best qualified person for the job."

d) "I'm the decider, and I decide what's best. And what's best is for Don Rumsfeld to remain as the secretary of defense."

answer: (d).
When I first saw this quote on Talking Points Memo, I thought it was a joke. I thought Josh was joshing. But no, Bush really said it. His petulant performance has to be seen to be believed; Crooks & Liars has the video.

Celebrity Cooking Showdown would be much more entertaining

if celebrities were being cooked.


Monday, April 17, 2006

Is our children learning?

I couldn't decide whether the Barbara Bush Humanitarian of the Week Award or the brand-new George W. Bush Logician of the Week Award would be more appropriate for this South Carolina social studies teacher. She attended the Columbia, South Carolina immigration rally last week and posted her account on freeweb. Upon reflection, I've decided to give the lady BOTH awards. A historic first.

Showing up at the rally with a sign reading "Illegal Immigration is ILLEGAL," Teach proceeded to win friends and influence people.

A woman was holding a sign that read " Who is not an immigrant?" "I'm not and my husband is not" I answered. With a very thick accent, she asked where I went to school. I queried what that had to do with anything. "Perhaps they did not do a good job in social studies. You don't know what an immigrant is." "Sweetie," I replied, " I TEACH social studies. I know what an immigrant is and I am not one. I have ancestors who WERE LEGAL immigrants."

So that's what they're teaching in social studies these days: Know your immigrants. Back when I was in middle school, social studies class consisted of watching films on current events, or to be precise, events that were current 20 years prior to my entering middle school. The films were good because they enabled the class and the coach/teacher to nap.

Anyway, our friendly teacher was minding her own business and everyone else's, when a reporter decides to interview her:

Before I got too far into the group, I was accosted by an ABC cameraman who asked if I would speak with him. I obliged and he was very polite and respectful in his questioning. As I was speaking a moonbat talking loudly on a cell phone leaned in near the camera and said, " There are a thousand people here and they are interviewing the one racist."

Gee, where would anyone get the idea our correspondent is a racist?

Monday was a bright beautiful day in Columbia. It was marred by several thousand immigrants ( estimates range from 3000 to 7000 - poor math skills no doubt) who marched to the statehouse steps.

Yeah. Nothing ruins a beautiful day quicker than a bunch of dirty immigrants.


Two black men, one I recognized as a local Democrat official, were registering people to vote.

Oh. Well, in fairness to her, I'm sure she had good reason for pointing out the race of the two men . . . I just can't figure out what it was.

As the crowd left I stood silently facing them with my sign raised high. They had to pass near me to get to the crosswalk. A police officer came over and said that he had received reports that I was harassing people.

Harassing people? Goodness, why would anyone think . . .

I noticed a young skinny pale curly haired lad with plaid seersucker pants holding a sign that said " we pick your vegetables" This guy looked like the last thing he might have picked was a nose. I asked what it was he picked. He sneered at me and said his grandparents were migrant workers. "Really," I asked, " we they LEGAL aliens?" He refused to answer.


All the above is what won our correspondent the Barbara Bush Humanitarian of the Week Award. But this is what secured the George W. Bush Logician of the Week Award:

I watched dozens of aliens jaywalk at the intersection and cut between cars. Why be surprised when laws are irrelevant that laws are ignored?

Perhaps you are wondering, how did our correspondent know these jaywalkers were aliens? Well, silly, it was at an IMMIGRATION RALLY. Of course they were all aliens. What else would they be? Only aliens would attend an immigration rally. See the logic?

Plus, they were probably brown.

Oh, and American citizens never jaywalk.

Update: On a related note, check out this wankerific cartoon by The State's Robert Arial. Why do these people assume everyone at an immigration rally is an illegal immigrant?


Monday, April 10, 2006

Bush says he's not gonna nuke Iran. In other words,

he's gonna nuke Iran.

Actually, you will note that Bush doesn't deny reports that he's planning to nuke Iran. Rather, he dismisses them as "wild speculation." So when he nukes Iran, he can say, "Hey, I was very careful not to say I wouldn't nuke Iran."

Not that he would, like, parse or anything. That would be so Clintonian.


Saturday, April 08, 2006

No. No. No.

They can't possibly be this stupid. Can they?

According to this Seymour Hersh article in the New Yorker, the Bush administration is planning a massive bombing campaign in Iran. Get this:

One former defense official, who still deals with sensitive issues for the Bush Administration, told me that the military planning was premised on a belief that “a sustained bombing campaign in Iran will humiliate the religious leadership and lead the public to rise up and overthrow the government.”

These are the people who told us the Iraqis would greet us with flowers. If this story is true they have learned nothing. NOTHING.

(Via Atrios)


Friday, April 07, 2006

Barbara Bush Humanitarian of the Week Award

Goes to the South Carolina Senate this week.

For this:


Whereas, the number of illegal aliens in the United States is reaching epidemic proportions; and

Whereas, the 2000 Census estimates that there are between six million and eleven million illegal immigrants in the United States; and

Whereas, the United States is a highly mobile nation and at any given moment, thousands upon thousands of illegal aliens are present in South Carolina; and

Whereas, the barbaric terrorist atrocities of September 11, 2001, are a grim reminder of the vital importance of the security of America's borders; and

Whereas, illegal aliens drain the state's valuable resources which should be reserved for those persons legally present in the State. And, if South Carolina refrains from providing services, particularly social services, to illegal aliens this could serve as a powerful deterrent to the presence of illegal aliens in the State. Now, therefore,

Be it resolved by the Senate:

That the members of the Senate, by this resolution, call upon the Governor of the State of South Carolina to declare, by executive order, that no illegal alien is eligible to receive any services or other assistance provided by the South Carolina Department of Social Services to the extent allowed by law.

No exceptions for abused and neglected children. Though in all fairness to my state's legislature, it refuses to adequately fund services for neglected native-born children, either.

I am a totally pro-gay, pro-bisexual, pro-transgender

liberal, and even I think this proposed bill is stupid.

(Story via tbogg)


Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Is it wrong of me to laugh at this?

‘Cleanup’ of artwork puts egg on sponsor’s face

Leslie Rech installed her artwork in an alley off Main Street on Sunday.

The next day, a “clean team” tore it down and threw it away.

Made of eggshells and a handmade dress, “Anna Dropped Her Basket” was to be part of “Accessibility Columbia: Making History on Main Street,” an installation art show opening Thursday.

Since early February, Rech had accumulated 300 eggshells for the work, a statement on homelessness and mental illness. The eggs hadn’t gone to waste; Rech used them to bake cakes for residents of a local women’s shelter.

“This is about the worst thing that’s happened in my career,” said Rech, an associate professor at S.C. State University who has done a dozen installations. “For it to happen to me in my hometown is shocking.”

Just as shocking: An employee of the City Center Partnership — a sponsor of the art show — took it down, said Lorri-Ann Carter, press representative for the partnership.

The work might have been damaged by wind and was not labeled as art, Carter said. She called it “an honest mistake.”

Matt Kennell, president of the City Center Partnership, could not be reached Tuesday. Efforts to reach Shane Hillard, director of operations for the organization, Tuesday afternoon were unsuccessful.

The City Center Partnership provides economic development, marketing and advocacy for downtown Columbia. It is funded by a special tax.

With Rech’s work gone, the exhibition now will include seven artists’ installations on Main Street and two more on Assembly.

The exhibition is scheduled to be up through May 7.

I feel guilty for laughing, but c'mon. 300 eggshells? In an alley? What did you expect?

[I promise more and better blogging soon. Soon, I tell you!]


This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?